The Great Garreg Mach Snowball Fight
by fyxyuc
Summary: With the White Heron Ball coming up, the students of the Officers Academy have been under a lot of pressure. And what better way to relieve that pressure than with a fun snowball fight? But this being Garreg Mach Monastery, of course it gets out of hand...


**AN:** Hi everyone! This is my first Three Houses related fanfic. I hope to do a bigger story about this game later, but I've decided to do a fun little one-shot first. I hope you all enjoy!

Garreg Mach monastery, Ethereal Moon, 1180

"All right, class." Byleth said to her class. "That will be it for the day. Please remember to get your authority practice in."

The Blue Lions all started packing up their work, chatting quietly to each other.

"Professor, do you know what will be happening over the weekend?" Annette asked.

"I'm not sure yet-"

Byleth was interrupted by Sylvain, who exclaimed excitedly, "Hey, it snowed! A lot!"

"Wait, really?" There was a flood of of footsteps as everyone ran to the door to see for themselves.

The courtyard was blanketed in pristine, picturesque snow. The clouds had gone and the sun's rays were creating a lovely effect on the snow, making it sparkle and shimmer. No footprints marred it's surface. It was like walking into a painting.

"Oh, how lovely!" Flayn exclaimed.

"Wow, we usually don't get snow like that outside of Faerghus." said Ingrid. "It reminds me of home."

At the same time, the Black Eagles and Golden Deer classes had just ended, and the other students started trickling outside, marveling at the winter wonderland outside. The houses started mingling, talking about the snow and the upcoming White Heron Ball and their fond memories of the snow. All was well…

Or, at least, all would have been well, if not for a certain young man named Claude von Riegan.

Despite not showing it, Claude was having a bit of a rough day. Lorenz had been getting on his nerves, he was feeling a bit homesick, he was up to his eyeballs in homework, and it had been a pretty boring class to boot. So, he decided to have a bit of fun to work his frustrations out.

Lorenz was standing with his back to Claude and talking to Ferdinand. Claude stealthily packed some snow into a small ball, and lobbed it at Lorenz's head. It hit him squarely in the back of his bowl-cut and exploded into small pieces, some of which fell down the back of his uniform. Lorenz whirled around to see a grinning Claude.

"Honestly Claude! Your behavior is some of the most unbecoming I've ever seen in a noble!" he yelled. "You ought to give some as to how you'll command respect from your subjects! Why, what would your grandfather say, if he could see you, his heir and the future leader of the Alliance, throwing snowballs like a child?! You should be ashamed of yourself-"

Claude, during Lorenz's rant, was already forming another snowball. He wound up and hurled it at Lorenz. However, Lorenz was expecting it, and sidestepped it, only for the snowball to hit a passing Leonie in the neck.

"What the heck, Claude!" she yelled.

"Sorry, I was aiming for Lorenz!" Claude called back.

Leonie's competitive ire was raised, and she packed up a good-sized snowball and threw it back at Claude. Claude also dodged it, and the snowball smacked Edelgard upside the head, which set Hubert off.

"Which one of you threw that!?" he demanded. "Do you realize you have just hit the future Empress of Adrestia?!"

"Stand down Hubert, it was merely a snowball." Edelgard said as she wiped the stinging snow off her face.

"One day they hit you with a snowball, the next day-what? Will they be throwing arrows and daggers at you too? I must teach them a lesson now, before it is too late to do so!"

"Geez, a bit overkill there, don't you think?" Caspar asked.

Hubert ignored both Caspar's comment and the objections of Lady Edelgard, and made a snowball before throwing it at Leonie with all his might. Unfortunately, his aim left something to be desired, and he missed Leonie entirely and got Annette right in the chest.

"Hey!" Felix yelled, before both he and Annette formed snowballs of their own and lobbed them back at Hubert. Annette's hit him in the side of his head, while Felix's went past him and narrowly missed Caspar.

"Oh, it's on!" Caspar yelled, and began making snowballs for himself.

Caspar's poor aim brought both Raphael and Sylvain into the mix, and Sylvain ended up hitting Dorothea, which led to her accidentally bringing Ferdinand into the fray, and before long…

The courtyard was a mess of snowballs being flung back and forth. The students who were not taking part were cowering in the classrooms or behind pillars, because it was impossible to flee without getting hit.

While the snowball battle was predominantly everyone for themselves, small alliances had sprung up between various combatants. Lorenz had long since joined the fight for two reasons: Marianne had gotten hit with a giant snowball, and Lorenz really wanted a chance to hit Claude in the face with a snowball, manners and nobility be damned. Caspar had formed a small snow fort that he and Linhardt (who had been unwillingly enlisted into this fight) were hunkered down behind. Claude had made a similar shelter, but since he was right in the middle of the battlefield, he was still being pelted with snowballs. Everyone else was either running and gunning around the battlefield, or staying in one place to hit everyone coming by.

Ignatz, Hilda, Flayn, and Bernadetta were hiding in the doorway to the Golden Deer classroom, watching the insanity.

"That beautiful snowy landscape… it's trampled into nothingness." Ignatz said mournfully as he watched Sylvain do an epic faceplant after Ingrid hit him in the back of his head.

"Geez, they're really giving it their all, aren't they?" Hilda remarked as she witnessed Ashe expertly snipe Hubert in the chest with a snowball from halfway across the courtyard.

"I wish they would just quit!" Bernadetta exclaimed. "I want to go back to my nice, warm room…"

In the Blue Lions classroom, Byleth, Manuela, and Hanneman were watching the carnage through the window.

"You know, I thought they were all being unusually antsy today." Manuela mused.

"It's likely that, with the White Heron Ball and their increasing schoolwork, they were all suffering from stress and cabin fever and needed to let it out in a -relatively- safe manner." said Hanneman.

"No, really? I would have thought they were all suffering from Boring Class-itis." Manuela said sarcastically, earning her an annoyed look from Hanneman.

"At any rate, I'm glad they're working out some of their cabin fever." said Byleth. "I had an awful time trying to get some of them to focus on their work today."

Right on cue, they saw Dedue dive in front of a particularly large snowball heading right for Dimitri, who proceeded to fling one of his snowballs right back at the sender.

Meanwhile, not far from the Academy classrooms, Catherine stopped and looked around.

"Something the matter?" Shamir asked as she and Alois turned to look at her.

"Do you hear that?" Catherine asked.

"I'm an old man, my hearing isn't what it used to be." joked Alois.

"What do you hear? A Demonic Beast? War cries?" Shamir demanded.

"No, I don't know what, but it sounds like it's coming from the Academy…"

As the three Knights of Seiros went to go look for themselves, the battle raged on, only growing in size.

"YEAH! Take THAT!" Raphael yelled as he lobbed snowballs at his peers. His aim wasn't anything to write home about, unlike some of the other combatants, but his throws were so hard and his body was so buff, that the others were having trouble mustering enough firepower to take him down.

"Raphael, look out!" Ignatz yelled from the Golden Deer classroom.

Raphael turned just in time to see Felix, Mercedes, Leonie, Hubert, Dorothea, Caspar, and Ingrid all aimed and ready to throw snowballs at him. Raphael put his hands up to defend himself, but it was too late…

Ignatz watched in horror as his friend was pelted with snowballs from right and left, bringing him to his knees, covered in snow and ice. Raphael looked up only to see his assailants preparing for another attack on him, ignoring the other snowballs flying around them. He took a deep breath and braced himself for the icy attacks that were soon to come.

The terror at seeing Raphael brought to the mercy of the other combatants ignited a fury within Ignatz he didn't know he had. He stood up straight, threw back his head, and screamed at the top of his lungs "RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGH!"

Hilda watched with confusion. Flayn watched with awe. Bernadetta watched with mild terror.

"I'LL SAVE YOU, RAPHAEL!" Ignatz yelled with all the wrath and determination of a warrior of old, before he charged out into the fray, dodging snowballs with incredible skill. He reached Raphael and somehow managed to tackle him all the way to the ground seconds before Raphael's attackers started lobbing their snowballs.

"Wha-Ignatz?" Raphael said in confusion when he looked to see his (significantly smaller than him) buddy lying on top of him using his own body as a shield and with an expression Raphael didn't even know Ignatz was capable of making.

"I'm here to save you!" Ignatz hissed. The onslaught stopped and Ignatz drew himself up to his full height (which wasn't very tall) and fiercely declared "Now, IT IS MY TURN! HYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!"

Ignatz began making snowballs with record speed, and started his counterattack. Before his opponents even knew what was happening, he annihilated them all, with perfect shots to the face, sending them all down. Unfortunately, his attack had attracted the attention of the other participants, and they started sending their own snowballs at the glasses-wearing boy, knocking him around from the force of their throws.

Raphael had recovered, and when he saw that Ignatz was now getting pummeled, he let out a shout of "IGGNAAAAAAAAATZZ!" and ran to join him. The two stood back-to-back, Raphael's strength and size combining with Ignatz's speed and accuracy to make a formidable team. They threw and dodged snowballs with unmatched skill.

Byleth, Hanneman, and Manuela had witnessed all of this and were staring in shock out of the window.

"Did… did Ignatz just get possessed by one of the Ten Elites or something?" Manuela asked.

Catherine, Alois, and Shamir had arrived at the edge of the courtyard just in time to watch Ignatz's warrior spirit emerge.

"Wow, they're fighting… fiercely." Alois remarked as they saw Claude expertly hit a snowball out of Ashe's hand.

"You know, it looks like fun." Catherine said "I think I'll join!"

"You sure?" Shamir asked.

Ignoring Shamir, Catherine charged into the fray with a yell of "HYAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH! LET'S DO THIIIIIS!"

Within seconds, Catherine was covered in snowballs from all sides, and was lobbing snowballs at anyone in range.

"Maybe I'll join too." mused Alois.

"You're too old." Shamir said.

"Excuse you, I am NOT-"

A snowball came flying right at Shamir. With lightning-fast reflexes, she reached in front of her and caught it a millisecond before it would have hit her. Alois was so shocked he forgot what he had been saying and just stared.

Hilda, Flayn, and Bernadetta were still watching from the Golden Deer classroom.

"Perhaps we should join in. It looks like everyone is having a good time." Flayn said.

"Are you kidding?! We'd die!" Bernadetta squealed.

"Besides, we're all too frail and weak." Hilda said. "I bet none of us would be able to hit anyone-"

She was cut off when a stray snowball got her in the cheek.

"HEY! WHO THREW THAT!?" Hilda yelled onto the battlefield.

"Sorry!" Caspar yelled back.

"I'll make you sorry!" Hilda yelled, and she stormed onto the battlefield, her earlier "weakness" forgotten as she let loose with a barrage of snowballs.

Flayn giggled and stepped out of the classroom and started forming snowballs of her own and throwing them at anyone running past. Bernadetta just whimpered and hid further back in the classroom.

Now, it just so happened that, like the Knights of Seiros, Seteth was passing by, and heard the yelling from the Academy and went to go investigate. What he saw when he got there were the students (and Catherine) covered in snow and ice, throwing snowballs at each other, and at the edge of the complete chaos was Flayn, who was gleefully dodging snowballs and retaliating with more of her own.

Seteth, who was as stressed as the students and maybe a little more sleep-deprived than he should have been, immediately panicked and sprinted straight towards the battlefield yelling "FLAYN!"

Within seconds of stepping onto the courtyard, Seteth was bombarded with snowballs, accidentally or otherwise. This didn't slow him down one bit, if anything, it steeled his resolve to get to Flayn as fast as he could. He continued running, ducking under flying snowballs.

As Seteth reached Flayn, he noticed a large snowball flying right towards her. There was no time to warn her, or push her out of the way. With nothing else to do, Seteth jumped into the air, dramatically diving in front of Flayn. The snowball hit him in the face and he fell to the ground, lying facedown in the snow with his arms outstretched.

Flayn stared at him for a moment.

"Brother?" she finally said.

"Yes, Flayn?" Seteth asked without raising his head.

"You… do realize that was just a snowball, right?"

"Yes."

"And that, if it had hit me, nothing bad would have happened, right?"

"Yes Flayn, I know." Seteth said.

Flayn, not quite knowing what to do after that, just stepped over Seteth and rejoined the fight. Seteth just remained lying on the ground out of embarrassment until Byleth and Manuela took pity on him and dragged him into the Blue Lions classroom.

"Well, that was one of the most dramatic things I've ever seen." Manuela remarked.

"Seteth, you realize that was just a snowball? A very non-lethal snowball?" Hanneman asked.

"Yes, I know!" Seteth snapped, before sighing "I apologize, Professor Hanneman, it's just that I have had a lot on my plate recently and I'm not quite thinking straight."

"Here, drink this." Manuela said, pulling out a flask and handing it to Seteth.

Seteth stared at it. "What exactly is in that?" he asked.

"Tea." Manuela said innocently.

"Tea and what?"

"Well, there may be a little bit of vodka in there, too…" Manuela admitted.

Seteth gave her a stern look.

Meanwhile, on the battlefield, the fight was still going strong, though everyone was starting to run out of steam. At the heart of it was Claude, who was still behind his fort, pelting the combatants with snowballs and dodging the ones thrown back at him and having the time of his life.

Lorenz was also still on the field. His noble upbringing, the years of etiquette, proper conduct and the honorable way of doing battle were all forgotten. All Lorenz cared about now, was revenge on Claude.

But that would not be easy. Claude was good, with impeccable dodging skills and amazing aim. Lorenz only had pure anger and determination on his side. But he also had a plan.

Lorenz made his move. Claude was preoccupied with Ingrid and Petra, so Lorenz had an opening. He moved to the side of Claude's fort, staying just out of his line of sight, and made the largest snowball he could while he waited to strike.

Claude managed to repel Ingrid and Petra's attack with a few well-placed snowballs, and was turning around to make new ones. Lorenz's chance had arrived.

"CLAAAAAAAAAUUDE!" Lorenz yelled as he launched his snowball. Claude turned around just in time to see the snowball flying at his face, but not in time to block or dodge it…

The snowball hit him dead centre of his face, exploding into smaller chunks that covered any part of Claude's face that the snowball hadn't gotten. The force of it was so great that Claude fell backwards onto the ground and sprawled out in the now-destroyed remains of his fort while staring at the sky in shock. Lorenz was so excited he forgot himself and began celebrating his victory by prancing around shouting "YES! HAHAHAHAHAHA! TAKE THAT, CLAUDE!"

Claude's defeat marked the end of the battle. Most of the combatants limped off the field exhaustedly and went to warm up. Raphael had to carry Ignatz off the field, and Caspar mostly crawled out. Claude had Hilda and Leonie help him up and dust him off. Seteth quietly left, still embarrassed about his little display. The professors all left to do damage control, as there would probably be at least a little bad blood after the fight. The Knights of Seiros left after digging Catherine out from the mountain of snowballs she had been buried. The Academy grounds had gone from a winter wonderland to the ruins of a fierce battle.

Pretty much everyone reconvened in the Dining Hall, as it was not only the warmest place in the monaster, but everyone was hungry after the snowball fight. A lot of them were wrapped up in blankets.

Ignatz was missing his glasses and shakily eating a bowl of soup, when Petra burst in.

"Ignatz! I have found the glasses!" she called.

"Oh, thank you so much Petra!" Ignatz replied.

"But, they are not whole…" she said sadly, and held out the broken, twisted remains of Ignatz's glasses.

Ignatz took them with a sigh and inspected them. "They must have gotten stepped on during the fight. Darn it! Now I have to send for new ones!"

"I am sorry, Ignatz." Petra said.

"It's not your fault. I should have been more careful." said Ignatz.

Lysithea, who was sitting nearby, asked "Here, can I see them?"

Ignatz passed them over to her and she checked them. Then she passed them back.

"I thought I might be able to fix these with magic, but they're too damaged." she said regretfully.

"It's alright. I can manage for a few days without them." Ignatz said with a smile.

Nearby, Lorenz was quietly eating a casserole when Claude walked up. "Hey, can we talk?'

"If you insist." Lorenz said with a hint of annoyance.

"Look, I'm sorry. I think we all got carried away. No hard feelings, okay?"

Lorenz's first thought was that Claude was just apologizing to get himself out of any potential repercussions, but on closer inspection, he realized Claude was being sincere. There was no hidden smile, or telltale glint in his eyes that Lorenz had come to recognize as Claude not telling the truth.

Lorenz sighed "Alright Claude, I forgive you. In truth, I also behaved quite poorly. I am sorry for hitting you in the face."

"Well, it was a great shot." Claude conceded with a smile.

Byleth was standing nearby watching the students as they ate, when she heard a familiar voice in her head.

"_My, my. Those children fought like it was a battle for life and death." _said Sothis.

"_I'm proud of all of them. Clearly, they learned something from my class."_ Byleth replied.

"_It was quite entertaining. I thought I would pass out from laughter when Seteth dove in front of Flayn like that."_ Sothis said amusedly. "_But why did you not join in?"_

"_I have to set a good example, as an authority figure."_

"_Well, it was one of the best things I have seen in a long time." _Sothis's voice took a wistful tone. "_I wish I had a body so I could have joined in."_

"_Maybe one day, Sothis." _Byleth said, before walking off to get some food.

And so, the tale of the Great Garreg Mach snowball fight ended. It was forgotten for quite a time in the wake of the events that were to come after the White Heron Ball. But even years and years later, it still brought a smile to the participants faces, as they thought about those days that were so much easier...

**AN:** Thanks for reading, guys! I hope you enjoyed.


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